Musical accompaniment: Sleep Walk by Santo & Johnny

 

I like to do little thought experiments sometimes, and creative writing.  One of my favorites is anachronisms–taking a person out of his rightful time and place and putting him somewhere else.

This is a tale of three men. We’ll start with our fashionistas.

This is Mr. James Thomson, in 1891.

And here we have Mr. G. Ransden, also in 1891.

They’re pretty interesting all on their own. Mr. Thomson looks like a man who is pretty impressed with himself, whereas Mr. Ransden is expressionless. I can’t see his eyes well but he gives the impression he has a sense of humor.  I’m distracted by his wild facial hair, but I suppose the burning question is, why did these two have formal portraits made while wearing winter coats and hats?  Then again, those coats are pretty boss.

Probably they were both socialites. Mr. Thomson, at least, has a very delicate air about him. I don’t know how to describe it other than someone who has always had servants.

To go back to the original idea of a thought experiment, picture to yourself a cramped waiting room at a depot. It has a few chairs, but it’s too small to avoid looking at the other people.

Imagine Mr. Ransden and Mr. Thomson are strangers who meet in this room, waiting for a train. They would recognize each other as kindred spirits, men who care about fashion. There would be a lot to talk about. They would definitely be eager to compare notes on the different tailors and barbers in Montreal and London. They would light cigars and before you know it, they would be having an uproarious time.

But then the door swings open and they hear a slow, heavy tread. They squint through the blue cigar smoke, and their eyes widen as the man comes into view and takes a seat. His name is Amasa Clark and he is from Bandera, Texas.

Mr. Clark was a Mexican War veteran (photographed by Noah Hamilton Rose).  Mr. Clark wears a black suit that is dramatically contrasted by hit gray and white beard. His appearance is both neat and plain. What a keen and piercing gaze he has though! I bet not much got past him. He looks tough too! Very tough. He probably had a pet rattlesnake. He was 97 years old in this picture but he has a sharpness to him the others.

I guess this would be an awkward interlude. But what’s your guess?  How would these Montreal gents react to our grizzled Texan?  And what would Mr. Clark think of these two dandies?  Who would be most uncomfortable?  Would any of them enjoy this encounter? Or maybe Mr. Clark and Mr. Ransden would form a bond based on their impressive facial hair, and they shun Mr. Thomson and his inadequate mustache.

 

Before you go, one of the most famous juxtapositions is the Velvet Elvis, the peanut butter, banana, and bacon sandwich Elvis loved.

I admit to being intrigued… but I’m pretty sure I’d have a heart attack no more than four minutes after consuming anything like this.  But if you feeling adventurous, here’s the recipe from a site called JoeyCooksFoods.